How do I tell my friends and family that I have Hashimoto’s thyroiditis?

Talking about health issues is never easy; there are always so many factors at play. How close are you with your inner circle? Is it common to discuss health concerns with them? What reactions might you expect? And most importantly, how and when do you start a conversation like that? Here are some ideas that could help.

Don’t put off the conversation

If you feel like telling someone, do it. The more you keep it to yourself, the more anxious you become. Sooner or later, your partner, friends, or relatives will be able to see it. And rather than bringing you closer, it will put a strain on your relationship.

Keeping quiet about a problem only makes it bigger. Facing a diagnosis all by yourself can lead to a state of despair, which can make it very difficult to make level-headed decisions. Moreover, by concealing your disease, you kind of confirm that Hashimoto’s thyroiditis is something to be afraid of, and that such terrible news will be unbearable for your family. Meanwhile, we all know that stigmatization does nothing but harm.

Prepare in advance

Tell your family about Hashimoto’s disease: what processes this condition causes, what the common symptoms are, and what your prognosis and treatment plan are. It’s best to put answers to these questions in a booklet, which your friends and family can turn to in moments of confusion. Don’t forget to mention what kind of support you might need from your nearest and dearest. For example, when they see you feeling down, they might decide that you need some good company, an interesting activity, or a funny story, when in fact what you really need during such moments is to be left alone. Tell your family, partner, and friends in advance what would bring you comfort in this or that situation, so that no one feels guilty. This kind of information will help everyone cope with anxiety and perceive the situation in a less emotional manner.

Listen to yourself

If, during the conversation, you feel like crying, sitting in silence, or being left alone, let them know; it will help relieve the tension. Once you calm down and get your thoughts together, you’ll be able to proceed with a more constructive dialogue.

Support your loved ones

The news about Hashimoto’s disease might come as a shock not only to you, but to your loved ones as well. They worry about your wellbeing as much as you do, so you shouldn’t be surprised if someone starts crying or asking questions. Come up to them, give them a hug, and hold their hand if you feel that they need your support. Yes, your lifestyle will be different and will require more attention. However, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you’ll get worse. Tell your loved one that your attitude to them won’t change and that you’ll always be there for them.

Another option is to suggest going to the next doctor’s appointment together. This way, your friends and family will have an opportunity to ask questions about your condition and new lifestyle and get the answers directly from a medical professional.

Be prepared to get backlash

Some people in your life might think that sudden weight gain or weight loss, sleepiness, or frequent displays of negative emotions can be used as an excuse to get under your skin or make an inappropriate joke. More often than not, such reactions come from a lack of knowledge or understanding of what you’re going through. No matter how hard it is, treat such moments as an opportunity to raise awareness about Hashimoto’s disease and clear up some common misconceptions.

Here’s an example of reaction  you might hear upon announcing the news, along with potential response you can use.

Write a letter

If you’re not ready to discuss the problem in person, you can start by writing a letter. List your symptoms and possible changes in your behavior, but more importantly, make sure to let your loved ones know what they can do to help. Ask them to read the letter without you and meet with them afterwards. This way, you can make the discussion more constructive.